Happy Mother's Day to ALL

Mother’s Day is extremely hard for me. Normally, I use the day to reflect on my life and time with my mother. She passed away 4 years ago, it still has not fully sunk in that she is gone. For the last three years, Mother’s Day has flown by in a bit of a haze. I stay home and clean or work. I focus on making the day blend in with the rest of the week so it does not serve as a reminder that my mom is not here.

I received a call from my dad and asked what I had planned for my stepmom this year. Nothing. I planned nothing. Thinking back, I cannot recall a time when I ever did anything for her on Mother’s Day. As a child, I was not the kindest nor the most welcoming towards her. In my mind, she was secretly trying to replace my mom and tear my family apart. As a lot of children from divorced households do, I fantasized about my parents falling back in love at any given moment and she was in the way. (Please note, my favorite movie as a child was the Parent Trap, both versions. Clearly, I was a little brainwashed.) Unintentionally, I carried this train of thought into adulthood. Not the part where my parents were going to get back together, but the notion that she was an obstacle in my life. It has taken years for me to realize how unfair and hurtful my behavior has been towards her. She has come to every dance recital, graduation, and birthday. There has never been a shortage of calls to check in, cheer on my triumphs, or offer support during my setbacks. I now see all of the love and support she has given me through the years without asking for anything in return and I am truly in awe and extremely grateful for her.

As I grow, I always strive to not only learn from my mistakes but also correct them. This will be the first year that I treat my stepmom to a Mother’s Day celebration that she deserves. There are so many women that are overlooked year after year even though they continue to go above and beyond for the people in their life. Even if you are not able to celebrate Mother’s Day with them let them know what they mean to you in some way. A lot of us would not be where we are in life had they not stepped in. Take the time to tell them thank you, show them how much they mean to you and when the opportunity comes go out of your way to show your gratitude.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there and to all the women who have stepped in as a mother on the side. I see you, I love you and I appreciate all that you do. Happy Mother’s Day!